Bullshit interview questions and other general nonsense floating in my head at 1:34 AM

by Rich DeMatteo on June 9, 2011 · 8 comments

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I began writing this at 1:34 AM, but I’m certain you put that together when reading the blog post title.

A ton is happening up in my head right now.  Some of it is job search/recruiting related.  Most of it is random.  A portion is kinda like ‘holy shit, I turn 28 on Sunday’.  And the last part is just dead space in my head.

Let’s explore my thoughts…

Some Random Thoughts

I’m in a wedding this weekend and I’m really excited.  I still hate house centipedes.  Donald Glover is beyond talented, and you should think so too.  My left foot is bare, while my right foot has a black sock on.  I don’t know where my other sock is.  My birthday is on Sunday and I turn halfway to 56.  I should probably find a girl worth girlfriending sometime soon.

Found my other sock.

It was under my really creaky, really uncomfortable computer desk chair.  I used to brag about this chair.  It used to be so comfortable, but 9 months of 10+ hours per day of ass sitting has completely washed away its full cushion feeling.  Shit.

I’m hungry.  I miss metabolism.  Writing out my thoughts just makes me want brownies with ice cream.

Rather than go to a diner by myself, I’ll carry on, finish this post, and head to bed.


Bullshit Interview Questions

We can all point out painfully pointless bullshit interview question.  Examples would be asking candidates which fruit they’d be if they were a fruit or how many windows are in Manhattan.  You know what I mean, right?

I was once asked the fruit question.  I responded that I would be a banana.  Why a banana?  Because I love them.  They are delicious to me.  No, not because I’m like a banana, and once you peel the outer layer you get to see the real me.  That’s probably what they thought I meant.  If I really wanted to be smart, I would have said I’m a bunch of grapes, because I work well in a team and like people around me.  God damn, I hate that question.

Honestly, these questions just never work.  Some people may swear by them, but I’m going to judge anyone who uses them.

Thankfully, there is a way to stick it to the interviewer without being a complete asshole and losing your chance for the job.  Simply put, answer it so brilliant that it drives them nuts.  Keep bringing up information.  Don’t stop talking about it.  Drive them nuts, because if they ask you that question, you simply might want to reconsider working there.

Here’s an example of how a bullshit interview question can go wrong.  Side note, the interviewee and interviewer have a bit of a personal issue going on, but if you watch The Office, then you already know that…


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