I’ve been keeping something to myself for a while now, but I’ll refuse to hold it in any longer.

A few months back, Penelope Trunk and I began talking about putting together an E-book that would become a free resource for Gen-Y Job Seekers.  Well, the project is near completion and we are planning on releasing the e-book on 7/20/10.

The subject/title of the E-book is, “What I know about getting a job”.

Rather than her and I write the entire book ourselves, we wanted to bring in a team of highly influential HR Professionals & Recruiters to contribute with a page of their own.  We found quite the team.

The list used to find contributers comes from John Sumser and HR Examiner.  Sumser released a list of the Top 25 Human Resources Digital Influencers in 2009, which couldn’t have been a better list of potential contributers.  Penelope and I were able to bring on a total of 17 contributers from the 25 members on the list.

What makes this e-book special is that each contributer has added in their own opinions, personal stories, and expertise surrounding jobs and careers.  They come from different perspectives, and even touch on different aspects of the job search.  When put together, their contributions create an e-book that brings you the entire job search/career advice spectrum.

Our -ebook will drop on Tuesday, July 20th, 2010.  It’s being brought to you by Penelope Trunk, Brazen Careerist, and Corn on the Job.  We are excited for this release, and we hope  you’ll join us in spreading the word surrounding our free new career resource for Gen-Y.

My dog is picky about where he urinates, and lately he’s worse than ever.  Let me explain.

A pretty wicked storm whipped through our town last week and it caused an ass-slapping ton of destruction.  My back yard is a public park with many trees, and the storm left dozens of huge branches, and thousands of small  branches and twigs laying on the ground.

It’s become a doggy urination mecca.

You see, the park used to be just the same old trees to whizz on, but now there is literally a pee point every where you turn.  It’s either a beautiful thing, or it’s driving dogs crazy.  My pup Rusty seems to be more on the crazy side.  He’s become very picky on which piece of dead tree is joyously marked.  He’ll run up to fallen branch or twig and sniff out the situation for a while.  If small enough, he’ll walk around the decaying bark to fully inspect it, and then eventually decide if he’s lifting his leg.  Usually he might find 2 or 3 leg-lifting spots, but with so many new opportunities on the ground, he’s going 6-8 times.

I’m cutting myself off.  I’m done writing about doggy urination, and maybe it’s time I throw in the “how this relates to your job search” section.  But do I really need it?  All bloggers take their life stories and then relate it to the purpose of their blog.  It’s what we do.  It’s how we try to keep things interesting and not sound like preachers.  But I’m not sure I want to do that….

You guys are smart folks, in fact I’ll even say you are very intelligent people.   I’m sure you can look at this story and point out how it relates to searching for a job.  You can probably talk about how it relates to the economy, maybe?  Should you be my dog?  Do you inspect things vigorously before lifting your leg?  I mean, you get what I’m saying….?

Answer my questions in your comments…

Some know that I’m a pretty wild hockey nut, and and a die hard Philadelphia Flyers fan.  For the first time in 13 years, the Flyers made it to the Stanley Cup Finals this year, which was a bigger deal to me than I could ever explain in words. When I was 2 or 3 years old, my father, a long time season ticket holder, started bringing me to games with him, and my passion for the sport began.

We haven’t won a championship in 35 years, so the last two weeks, and all of this years playoffs have been exciting.  We finished the year as the 7th seed, and somehow managed to overcome impossible odds to make it to the finals.  While we lost to the Hawks, I’m proud of the team and everything they accomplished.  It’s been one hell of a run, but the playoffs have consumed my mind a good bit, and I’ve been away from the blog more than I liked to.

Consider this my lengthy thank you to the Flyers, and also my apology to you, for being MIA.

So what else… oh, it’s my birthday tomorrow.  Yep, Mr. Corn turns 27 tomorrow.  While I’m celebrating tonight, the real party begins next week in the Outer Banks down in North Carolina.  Me and 7 friends have rented a house for the week and I couldn’t be more excited.  While away I will try to get a video post up and show something scenic, but don’t hold your breath.  I haven’t done too many of those, so I’m not sure why I’ll start.  Maybe I’ll see something that inspires me to turn on the new Kodak zi8 camera I got for the birthday.  Maybe.

Lastly, I’ve set up three guest bloggers for next week while I’m away.  I know that you will enjoy what Srinivas Rao, Sarah White, and Lauren Koda bring to COTJ next week.  Not exactly sure what day they their posts will go live, but stay tuned and check back next week to find out.

Yes, I did say ‘Corn Family’, and yes, I really did buy the domain names CornyResumes.com and CornyJobs.com.  It did happen, it is very real.

Why, Rich…why?  Let’s think about it.

We all know that deep down, we wish that we were associated with a vegetable.  Don’t lie.  You know you sometimes wish that when people saw green beans that they immediately think of you.  See where I’m going?

Slowly, but surely, you are all being brain washed to think of me and this blog whenever you see anything that has anything to do with corn.  Oh, I’m so slick.

Maybe I’m kind of joking, but maybe I’m kind of serious.  I mean, when I see or hear anything about being pant less, I might think of Matt Cheuvront.  When I hear someone say “I’m So _______” then I’ll probably think of Sarah White.  Me?  I’ve got Corn.  I’m running with it.

Alright, so what is my plan for CornyResumes.com and CornyJobs.com?  It’s yet to be determined, but here are some ideas.

CornyResumes.com

Idea # 1 – Recruiters come across many “Corny” resumes in their career, and they usually just become a funny story, and the best of the worst become legendary.  What if there was a place where these resumes could be on display for all to see and learn from?

Obviously, all contact and company information would be blanked out, but recruiters would have a place to send in the hilarious, stupid, and ridiculous resumes they receive into CornyResumes.com.

Think FMyLife.com and TextsFromLastNight.com.

Idea #2 – Maybe this idea is a bit more boring, but CornyResumes.com could turn out to be my own resume writing business.  I review a ton of resumes each week, offer my suggestions for edits, and even help write a few.  Why not turn it into some bling bling?

Idea #3 – Maybe both Idea #1 and Idea #2 mesh to become CornyResumes.com.  Maybe?

CornyJobs.com

Idea # 1 – Job seekers and happily employed folks come across their fair share of awful job descriptions, hilarious work stories, and other “corny” situations in the work place.  These are stories that need to be shared.  This is where CornyJobs.com would come in.

Keeping all things anonymous, peeps could submit their stories of “corny” bosses, awful job descriptions, and terrible work situations.

Again, think FMyLife.com and TextsFromLastNight.com

Idea #2 – CornyJobs.com could become a job board for people to post odd jobs, or even professional jobs.  Boring, but again, some extra bling bling wouldn’t be a awful.

Idea #3 – A mix of Idea #1 and Idea #2.  Hmmmm….?

Maybe Idea #4 for each of these is “nothing”.  If nothing happens, then that is OK too.  For now I’m going to just remain happy that I own these.

What are your thoughts? What do you think should become of CornyResumes.com and CornyJobs.com?

The Story

OK, so back when I worked as a technical recruiter, I used to interact with some pretty wild job seekers.  And by wild, I mean that some crazies told me way too much about their personal lives.

I’ve had job seekers send me pictures of their newborn babies, their weddings, their vacations, and their pets.  They’ve told me about the people they date, how poor they are, how sick they are, and have even told me gross personal secrets about their hiney.

While all of it is unwanted, this one story sticks out in my mind most clear.

One of our clients had a 3 week deployment project in Minnesota, and they needed 2 or 3 people to work the gig.  I came across a resume that looked perfect for the work, so naturally, I sent an email and left a voicemail.  The day ends, and I get nothing back from the candidate.

The next morning I receive an e-mail that goes something like…

I’m sorry for not getting back to you sooner.  I had to go to the doctors yesterday to get a cyst in my butt lanced.  Ouch!

Yes, the person really did say “Ouch!” , and no, I didn’t send their resume to my client.

The Lesson

Be friendly, and outgoing, and witty, but don’t tell your recruiter or hiring manager about your butt.  In fact, don’t tell them about any body part.  They want to know if you are qualified, and they want to help you get a job.  They do.  They really do.

See them as a business partner, not your best friend.  If you get hired to work for their company or their client, then maybe you can keep in touch and share a few drinks.  At that point, possibly bring up the person you are dating, the babies you have, the vacation you’ve been on, or even a crazy story from a bachelor party.  Just please… please god… don’t ever talk about your butt.

Phone calls with my boomer bud, Steve Levy, are becoming quite frequent.  When we spoke again yesterday, I walked away with some profound boomer advice, and a new take on my own career destination.  He let me in on a question that he asks folks who might need help  figuring out what they should be doing in their life/careers.  The question is, “If money wasn’t a factor, what is the one thing you would be happy doing for the rest of your life?”

When first hearing the question, most people might respond back and say, “I love computer programming”, or “I just love inside sales”, or “social media is my passion”.  Is that really the burning love in their life?  You’ll find that most people are just simply answering the question wrong.

When Steve asked me the question, my first response was “Hockey and weight lifting”.  Not only have I played and coached hockey, but I’m an NHL addict.  I first thought about how coaching wouldn’t be realistic for me, and Steve and I began looking for careers on NHL.com and discussed other options in the hockey industry.  We then looked up body building supplement companies in the Philadelphia area that would support my love for that industry as well.  In just a 10 minute brainstorm session on the phone, we were able to identify more options in those industries than I thought might even exist.

When thinking about your passion, don’t just target your skill set or the job title you seek, but pay attention to what gives you pure enjoyment in your life.  If you love the industry, already have profound knowledge about the workings of the industry, and could see yourself never wanting to leave a profession in that industry, then it’s worth at least looking into.

• Maybe you really love music.  Check out places like VH1.
• Maybe you really enjoy ice cream.  Why not check out Haagen Daz or Ben & Jerry’s?
• You were your college’s best frisbee player.  Find out who is the leading frisbee manufacturer and work your way in.

I’ve talked about how passion is a buzz word that’s tossed around often, but I still am a huge advocate of it.  It’s not absolutely necessary for it to be present in our careers for us to be completely happy, but having in our professional lives can’t hurt.

Answer Steve’s question:  If money wasn’t an issue, what job would you do for the rest of your life?

If you really want something, you should be willing to do almost anything to get it.  I mean, let’s take Ke$ha for example.  This whack job artist, wanted to break into the pop scene so bad that she broke into Prince’s home to leave him a demo.  Classy?  Maybe not, but classy isn’t really her game.

Seriously, look at her.  She has a terrible voice, awful lyrics, and uses a $ sign in her name…

She’s obviously not that smart, and she really isn’t talented, but you know you’ve car danced to her songs.  Did you know that “Tik Tok” is the longest running debut single by a female artist since 1977?  Doesn’t that make you want to just put your head into a lions mouth and hope for the worst?

Instead of getting annoyed by Ke$ha, from now on I’m using her as motivation.  When I want something badly, I’ll do what I can to make it happen.  Breaking into homes, and using a $ somewhere in my name will no longer be off limits.

In the end, it’s about thinking way outside the box to attain your dreams.  What can you start doing differently?

Sarah White and I led a track at #truUSA on Generation Y.  In the unconference format, we talked about Generation Y and the similarities and/or differences between them and other generations.  Things were going just splendid.  The debate was hitting different parts of the room, from all levels of professional expertise.  Time was winding down, when all of a sudden the universe threw me a slippery curveball.

Sarah and I received a question from the left side of the room.

“Why do you think that Gen Y feels entitled to attain higher level positions, and high salaries so early in their career?”

My response…

“We’ve been told our entire lives that we can accomplish anything we want if we just put our minds to it, and if we have passion, then we can simply bypass the hard work.”

While answering the question, I began realizing that maybe other generations were told the same. My eyes danced around the room looking for someone that might just fall into the Boomer category.  Finally, I made eye contact with my target, Mr. Steve Levy, and he knew exactly what I was about to ask.  I started to stutter…

“Umm Steve, do you think that my parents were ummm told similar…”

Before I could finish asking him if his parents and teachers gave Boomers the same level of encouragement that Gen Y received, he cut me off and said…

“Yes Rich, I am your parents”

While the room bursted out into laughter, I finally realized why Steve had called my house randomly a few months back before we had met each other.  It all made sense, Steve Levy is my parents. Just look at us…

What else did I learn at #truUSA?

• When your flight is cancelled, you receive a $6 voucher for food.  Thanks for half a beer, Delta.
• I learned that Craig Fisher (FishDogs) and I are in a bromance called CornDogs.
• Sarah White doesn’t mess around.  When she says she’s taking you to the worlds largest indoor water park, she means it.  Oh, and when she hits her head while going down the ride, and is dumped into 9 feet of water, it’s not only scary, but very funny. Scary for the life guard, but funny for me.
• Shaune Moreke laughs just as much in person, as she does on HRHappyHour.
• Richard Long confirmed that New Zealanders love Flight of the Conchords.
• Margo isn’t a bad driver, unless she’s in Wisconsin.
• Ryan Leary is just way more Philly than I am, and I’ll have to live with it.
• Rayanne Thorn and I need to have many more conversations about blogging.
• Steven Rothberg learned more than he wanted about corn.
• I look up to Andy Gregory.  Both because the man is very bright, and because he’s way tall.
• Jerry Albright will probably call me Corn for the rest of my life, and I’m very OK with that.
• Bryan Wempen and Michael VanDervort are people that I NEED to learn from.
• Kevin Grossman has further encouraged me to just go with it and let life happen.

Gimungous thanks to Geoff Webb, Bill Boorman, and Maha Akiki for the wonderful event!

I’m not easily annoyed.  In fact, I’m known to be a calm, cool, and collected dude.  With that said, some Twitter users drive me absolutely insane, and Twitter Starfuckers are damn near the top of the list.

Alright, so maybe you don’t know what it means to be a Twitter Starfucker.  Let’s look at a few Starfucker definitions from Urban Dictionary:

1. Someone that shallowly idolizes and apologizes for celebrities just because they are celebrities in the hope that they can one day be lifted to their iconic level.

2. A person who obessessed with and seeks out personal interaction with celebrities. The desired interaction is often, but not necessarily, sexual in nature.

3. Someone who thinks some brief nearly non-existent connection with some great legend practically makes them a great legend too.

Looking at these definitions should give you a pretty solid idea of what it means to be a Twitter Starfucker.  It’s basically someone on Twitter that RT’s and/or sends @ messages/reply’s to the big names on an almost daily basis.  And when I say big names, I’m not talking about the folks in your industry with 10,000 followers, I’m referencing the people that have a follower count up near or way over 100K.

Some examples would be Gary Vaynerchuk, Tim Feriss, and Chris Brogan.  Of course there are many more, but the 3 listed have quite a few Starfuckers.

You’ve RT’d or sent an @ message to a certain star or stars a few times, do you gain the label?  If it’s only been a handful of messages over a long period of time, then you need not worry, you don’t qualify.  The Twitter Starfucker label is reserved for folks that have that burning desire to be noticed by the big names, and it’s fucking annoying.

Why am I annoyed?

Great content, innovation, and truly making a difference for a large group of people will bring recognition and success.  Without those three things, you can RT the big names as much as you want, but it’s not doing anything for you, you just look like a pathetic asshole, begging for fame.

I love Gary’s book, Crush it, but I haven’t jumped all over him or tweeted anything from him.  Before I joined Twitter, we talked about Tim Feriss and his book in my Human Resources Masters classes, and while I was a huge fan, I’ve only tweeted him once.  And lastly, I have no clue what Chris Brogan is all about, and I really don’t care.

If any of these 3 stars ever want to reach out one day, then that’s great, but I’m certainly not going to go begging for their recognition.

On Monday I announced a $20 Starbucks Gift Card Contest here on COTJ, in which you were asked to submit suggestions on ways I can take this blog to the next level.  The response was absolutely incredible, and created enough comments/submissions that I decided to hand out 3 additional Starbucks cards.  I’ve used a random number generator to select out a $20 card winner, $10 card winner, and 2 $5 card winners.

And your winners…

$20 Starbucks Card Winner – Kelly Ashworth

$10 Starbucks Card Winner – Grace Boyle

$5 Starbucks Card Winner – Megan Cassidy

$5 Starbucks Card Winner – Reed Porter

Congratulations to the winners of this contest.  I will send each of you an email to grab your contact information, and then you’ll receive your cards sometime next week!

For those who did not win, I thank you for your comments and suggestions for my blog.  They have all been captured, and I’ve already started to look for ways I can use each suggestion.  The topics for COTJ and the questions for #JobHuntChat you’ve suggested are exactly what I was looking for.  When these suggestions are brought to life, I’ll contact you so that you are able to view the result of your suggestion.

Again, thanks to all of you for sending back genuine, and insightful suggestions for COTJ.  Please feel free to contact me by email  (CornOnTheJob @ gmail.com)  or on Twitter (@CornOnTheJob) to chat, or discuss your suggestions for COTJ further.